Adolescent paradigms

Most teens believe negative statements about themselves at one point or another. These beliefs or paradigms are very strong emotions and are very real to the person who believes them.

Paradigms are often formed in infancy when children are very susceptible to what is going on around them. They hear and see things that are not always accurate from their parents, other adults, siblings, and the media. This causes their beliefs about themselves to become distorted.

Here are some statements that most teens believe:

1. Nobody understands me.

2. Nobody cares about me.

3. Everyone is more popular than me.

4. Nobody likes me.

5. I feel ugly.

6. I feel stupid.

7. I feel like running away from home.

8. Everyone is more handsome than me.

9. I just want everyone to leave me alone.

10. My parents treat me like a baby.

11. Everyone is smarter than me.

12. I really want to cry.

13. Sometimes I feel like I’m going crazy.

14. Everyone looks at me.

15. Anywhere in the world would be better than here.

16. Everyone is happier than me.

17. I feel worthless.

18. I have no purpose.

19. Everybody wants to catch me.

20. I’m just not up to the task.

There is a problem with believing these paradigms or statements. They are all inaccurate or incomplete even though we are convinced that they are true. Our paradigms or beliefs can mislead us and create limitations. They result in negative thoughts that make us look at life with a negative perspective.

Paradigms are like glasses and when you have an incomplete or incorrect paradigm about yourself or about life in general, it is like wearing glasses with the wrong prescription and not seeing things clearly. Your wrong belief could cause you to see something completely opposite to what it really is.

Paradigms are constantly changing as we learn and grow, and adolescent paradigms are often temporary. Once we become young adults, these erroneous beliefs will change or lose importance as we realize that they are not true at all.

It is important that we are aware of these erroneous beliefs and try to develop a positive outlook so that we do not carry them with us into adulthood. We have to work hard to change those gray glasses we wear and make sure they let us see life clearly.