Am I the right lord?

Introduction

So you’re single and you’re looking for Mr. Right. Maybe you enjoy the freedom of this time in your life and go on recreational dates, keeping your options open until “the right guy” comes along. Or maybe you’re the type to feel like dating is your sealed fate, forever dating one guy after another, only to walk away from every disappointed experience and question whether you’ll ever find a compatible life partner. Whatever your situation, it’s important to remember that finding the right man is only part of the equation for a successful relationship. The other part, which is actually more important, is to become Mr. Right yourself.

The Law of Attraction states that the similar attracts the similar. What you expose in your life will be reflected in you. This theory claims that, for example, if you exude confidence and positivity, this will draw like-minded people to you like a magnet. On the contrary, if he exhibits depressed and pessimistic behavior, he is likely to attract people with similar qualities … if he does! So whether you’re blissfully single and just “go with the flow” or frustrated at the lack of performance in your dating efforts, the most important thing you can do for yourself at this stage of your development as a single person is invest. on yourself and become Mr. Right. You want to be at your best so that when your Right Mr. Right comes into your life, he is ready and available for him and you don’t potentially miss out on a golden opportunity.

Evolution of a great boy

Self-actualization, or striving to reach one’s full potential, is at the core of this evolution to become Mr. Right and is a lifelong process for all of us as we grow, change, and learn valuable lessons through of the challenges we face in our daily lives. By de-emphasizing worries about why it is so difficult to find a decent man and reflecting on whether you are going to be single forever, you can channel these unproductive thoughts and feelings into something meaningful that will truly impact your life in a positive way. road. It is not about minimizing the value and importance of having a special man in your life for company and intimacy; it is a basic human need to achieve a sense of belonging and connection. But until that time comes, putting all your attention on something external to yourself that you may not have much control over only leads to feelings of helplessness and helplessness that will sabotage your ultimate goals. You can’t get Mr. Right into your life. You only have control and responsibility over yourself and your choices and actions. Take advantage of this valuable phase of your life as a single gay man to put your life in order and not have distractions that prevent you from hooking up to that special stud. Nothing would be more brutal than missing out on him because you weren’t emotionally available or even aware that he was right in front of your face.

Are you on a date? Would you go out with you? Who do you see looking at you when you look at your reflection in the mirror? Are you proud of the man you’ve become? If you were hesitant on any of these questions, what does that say about you at this juncture in your life? If you don’t feel good about who you are and what you have to offer, you can’t expect others to see it as an advantage. From what you know, you may be unconsciously giving off vibrations that reflect how negative you feel about yourself or how dissatisfied you are with your accomplishments, and in fact, you could be thwarting your dating efforts by making men who might normally be interested parties stay away. Get work done now to bring more balance and wholeness to your life and identity before the right guy shows up to make him even more attractive and make sure you don’t lose him by not being ready or available.

Life assessment

It’s time to take a complete inventory of your life and determine your strengths and weaknesses that help and hinder your cause. You’ll want to capitalize on your personal assets and view your weak areas as “growth points” to develop self-improvement goals. And then do what you have to do to overcome any barriers or obstacles that prevent you from having a great quality of life. Take an overview of all the different parts of your life and assess how you feel that you are doing in each of the following areas:

* Physical health and appearance.

* Emotional well-being

* Spirituality

* Relations with the family

* Friendship and support system

* Home environment and living arrangements.

*Education

* Work / Career

* Sex life

* Comfort with being gay and level of “exteriority”

* Comfort with masculinity and gender identity.

* Financial situation

* Self-esteem

* Access to resources

* Social and dating skills

You will also want to identify additional things like “unfinished business” from the past, mental health issues, losses that have yet to be fully regretted, addictions of any kind (alcohol / drugs, gambling, sex, food, internet, exercise, work , etc.) and any stressors in your life. These things can distract you and prevent you from becoming fully involved in your life and achieving true personal growth. A personality tinged with a “bad attitude”, a hardened demeanor and a downcast spirit can also embitter success with life and love.

Another technique you can do to become more self-aware of your strengths and “growth areas” is to make a list of all the qualities you look for in a life partner. Once you have completed this, go back through the list and compare the items you have identified with yourself. Are the things on this list? If not, you’ve just identified a few more goals to work towards to become Mr. Right.

Tips to be all you can be

o Once you’ve created a list of areas you’d like to focus on, create specific, concrete, and measurable goals that you can then put into an action plan. This will give you a good structure to work with, as well as a good measure of responsibility.

o Identify obstacles to success. For example, if you don’t have some of the qualities you attribute to your ideal Mr. Right, why? What’s stopping you? Enlist the services of a trained therapist or life coach who can help you overcome these obstacles more quickly.

o Get out of your own way! Fear and negative self-talk are often the two biggest culprits that get in the way of our dreams and goals. Develop the courage and resilience to take safe and calculated risks that will guide you on the path to your goals. Challenge the negative “whispers” of your inner critic and replace them with more affirmative personal statements that align with your vision.

o A man with a strong sense of self, positive self-esteem, good manners and social courtesy, healthy assertiveness and a solid value system, not to mention that he has integrity, honesty, and is passionate about life and lives it with meaning. it’s really sexy!

Conclution

By taking the focus off your perceived lack of success in the dating world and putting it more directly into building your own personal reserves, you will feel more fulfilled in your life and this has a way of projecting a more positive ‘aura’, making it even more attractive inside and out. It’s about attitude and taking proactive steps to grow into the kind of man you can feel good about. Many benefits can come from this, including but not limited to a boyfriend. So get absolutely fabulous … and remember, one “good catch” deserves another! Cheers for your success!

© 2007 Brian L Rzepczynski

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