My boyfriend says I’m needy! How to change this now
Nothing hurts a woman more than a negative comment directed directly at her. It hurts to be criticized by anyone. When the person saying it is your boyfriend, it makes it that much worse. Men can be critical about many things. One of those things is interwoven with our sensitivity and desire to be close. Hearing your boyfriend tell you that he thinks you’re too needy is devastating. He leaves you feeling insecure about how you should act and aware of everything you are doing. You worry about every little thing you say to him and wonder if he is separating your words and actions. Being told that you are in need is not an easy thing. But it doesn’t have to define you or the relationship you share with your boyfriend. You can change the scope of how he sees you and re-establish a more balanced bond with him.
Whenever a woman tells her friends, “My boyfriend says I’m needy,” they’ll usually tell her he’s wrong. Your friends are there to protect you. They don’t want to add to your emotional discomfort by telling you that you may actually be needy and that may be driving your guy away. Women and men tend to view the idea of being needed in very different ways. For us, we simply see it as a sign of how deep and unwavering our love is for our boy. For men it is a sign of despair and unattractive.
If your boyfriend has told you he thinks you’re too needy, don’t dismiss it. Don’t get super sensitive and collapse in a pool of tears. That won’t help anything. He will see your outburst as a sign of how right he is to observe you. If you can’t handle criticism very well, he’ll stop sharing his feelings and eventually that will create so much emotional distance that he’ll walk away forever.
Tackle the problem head-on. Obviously she wouldn’t have shared what she felt unless she wanted things to change. You have to start looking honestly at your behavior within the relationship. If you’re constantly chasing your boyfriend in hopes of spending time with him, that’s too needy. If you need constant reassurance that he loves you, that’s too needy, too. Jealousy can also be interpreted as neediness, so keep that in mind as you go.
A step in the positive direction for you is to become more independent. Instead of relying on your boyfriend for everything, make an effort to take better care of yourself in every way. Spend more time apart from your guy pursuing your own interests. It’s also a good idea to surround yourself with friends who see you in the best light possible. With your encouragement of support, you will begin to see how strong and self-reliant you really can be.
By trusting yourself and your own inner strength more, you’ll not only show your boyfriend that you don’t need him anymore, but you’ll also make yourself more attractive at the same time. Nothing is as sexy and attractive to a man as a woman who is confident and clear about how valuable she thinks she is. Leave your need behind and show your man exactly how amazing and driven you are.