Dynamics of the mind: What are mental signals?

Mental cues are triggers that everyone clings to on a subconscious level. Most people don’t even know they exist. If you are dealing with people like a teacher, preacher, counselor, doctor, or salesperson, everyone should become familiar with these elements. You will be able to get a better relationship with people or, in the case of a salesperson, increase your income and closing rates. These signals, as I mentioned, are very subtle and are stored at the subconscious cellular level. Let’s look at a very strong mental signal:

When young, most have wonderful memories of their mother or grandmother and spending time with her in the kitchen. You can remember all those good times and loving conversations the two of you had while baking chocolate chip cookies. Now as a senior, every time you walk into a mall and walk past Mrs. Field’s or Nestlé Cookie Store and smell those freshly baked chocolate chip cookies; you immediately get a wonderful loving feeling that overwhelms you; that memory of you with your mother or grandmother so many years ago. This is an example of a mental cue that was triggered by the sense of smell. Do you see how these work? Now, the opposite could also be true: if bad memories occurred, that same smell would provoke a negative response when passing through the same store.

For everyone who has to speak or perform in groups, here’s a very powerful hint: When speaking, never and I mean never, raise your hands above shoulder level! Why is that? A large part of our global society suffered abuse at some point in its childhood. If you raise your hand or arms above your shoulders, this triggers a negative mental signal of having been hit or caught since childhood. This can leave a negative impression of you with audience members who had a subconscious trigger at the time. Do you remember President Clinton? He was a master at this point. He always kept his hands on what was called the Clinton box, above the navel and below the shoulders. You should do the same when you stand in front of a group.

Here’s another one; When you talk to someone, never and again I mean never, point your index finger at it. Do you remember as a child all those times when your parents told you how bad you were while pointing their index finger at you? Guess what? Pointing your finger will cause the same negative Mind Cue trigger that is being scolded and your customer will not buy from you now. Always point or point at someone with all your fingers together and your hand open, as if you were going to shake someone’s hand. This will ensure that you don’t trigger that ‘pointy finger trigger’.

When meeting or working with a client / client / patient, never stand next to them while sitting in a chair. You should sit next to them or kneel at eye level. Why? Remember when you were a kid and your parents would scold you for doing something wrong? Usually you were sitting in a chair and they were on top of you. The physical dynamics of you standing next to your customer will elicit those same negative emotions of being scolded by a parent and you will lose that sale. This is also a great way for waiters and waitresses to increase their tips – kneel at the table or sit in an empty chair / booth while taking your customers’ orders. Data were collected in 1991-1992 on a sample of 207 dinners at a Mexican restaurant and on a sample of 148 dinners at a Chinese restaurant in Houston, Texas. The servers used a coin toss to randomly determine whether they would stand up or squat when they first interacted with a table. They also recorded the size of the customers’ experimental condition invoice and the size of the tip. A waiter at a Mexican restaurant increased his average tip by $ 1.22 (from 14.9 percent to 17.5 percent of the bill) by squatting at the table when introducing himself to customers. A waitress at a Chinese restaurant increased her average tip by $ 0.72 (from 12 to 15 percent of the bill) by squatting next to their tables. [We will examine more restaurant applications later in a new program specifically designed for waiters and waitresses].

Are you starting to see a pattern? Most mental signals are embedded in our subconscious mind during our formidable childhood years; and most are negative in nature. I hope that from these few examples you can see how important mastering Mind Cues can be to your career.

Mental cues are included in the category of non-verbal communication skills and body language. Some call nonverbal communication a “second conversation” that occurs simultaneously with our “first” verbal communication. Depending on the books and research you read, some say that the non-verbal is just as important as the verbal; while others say that the non-verbal is MORE important than the verbal message. I tend to follow the opinions of the latter group. For me, after having studied non-verbal skills and having taught public speaking courses, you must be very aware of what you are doing in front of a group. In fact, gestures speak louder than words because, as we have seen here, they are directly linked to subconscious memory and trigger points.